Twas the Night Before Christmas 2007 Cell Phone Review

Twas the night before Christmas when all through the realm

Not a Samsung was stirring not even a twelve-nine.

The iPhones were hung by the chimney with care,

In hopes that St. Steven soon would be there.

The children were nestled all snug with their phones,

While visions of Motos danced in their tones.

And mamma with her widget and I with my jack,

Had just settled down to play with our crack.

When out on the lawn there arose such a chatter,

I threw down my smartphone and sought out my fatter.

Away to the window I brought out my flash.

Tore open the shutters and threw out the Dash.

The tune in my breast as the new-fallen snow

Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects that GO.

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear

But a moguled Android and eight tiny reindeer.

With a little old driver, so googled and knoogled

I knew in a moment he must have been snoogled.

More rapid than nanos his courses they zuned

And he whistled and shouted, and called them ituned!

Now Dasher! now Dancer!, now Prancer and Vixen!

On, Comet!, On Cupid!, on Donner and Blitzen!

To the top of Redmond! to the top of Mountain View!

Now crash away! crash away! crash away all!

As dry leaves that before the wild tornado fly,

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky

So up to the house-top the coursers they flew

With a sleigh full of Toys, and St. Steven too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The ringtones and vibrations of each little hoof

As I drew in my head, and was churning around, 

Down the chimney St. Steven came with an iphone.

He was dressed all in denim, from his head to his foot,

And his clothes were all covered with logos and loot.

A bundle of Ipods he had flung on his back

And he looked like a peddler, just opening his pack.

His eyes how they twinkled, his dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, he nose like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow.

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth

And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.

He had a broad face and a little round belly.

That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly!

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself!

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

And filled all the stockings, then turned with a jerk.

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose!

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, 'ere he drove out of sight,

"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"